Get People to Like You with this Simple System - "The Like Switch" by Jack Shafer

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How Do You Get People to Like You More?

We’ve heard it before, “Just be yourself!” But according to the book, “The Like Switch” by Dr. Jack Schafer, you should first use a system that helps you connect with someone, and eventually gaining their trust and getting them to like you.

In his book, he gives two strategies that you can apply to situations like job interviews, schools, business colleagues, and whenever you have to get people to like you.

Apply These Lessons to English

In this episode, I will teach you how to apply these strategies to your life, and use simple tactics when talking to others in English . Stop just getting “likes” on your Facebook and Instagram posts and start getting real likes.

The Main Points

  • sometimes it’s better to not be yourself when you first meet someone
  • FRIENDSHIP FORMULA = PROXIMITY + FREQUENCY + DURATION + INTENSITY
  • try to be around the person you’re trying to get to like you
  • the longer you are with some, the better
  • use friendship signals to make someone become more comfortable around you
  • empathetic statements show the other person you are listening to them
  • Use the technique of LOVE to get other people to speak –
  • L – listen properly
  • O – observe the other person’s non-verbal communication
  • V – vocalize your words in accordance with your emotions and situation
  • E –  Empathize  the other person knows you understand their situation

The Vocab & Expressions

to go over (1:30) –

to win over – (2:30)

nod your head – (5:10)

an acquaintance – (5:15)

to posit – (5:45)

to gravitate towards – (6:00)

give a crap – (6:30) Cares about something

disengage – (9:50) to not pay attention; disconnect

to cope with – (10:55) to handle a problem, take responsibility

understand where someone is coming from (expression) – (10:40)  understand their perspective; opinion

to resonate with you – (11:20) If it connects with you, if you found it interesting and relevant

The Joke

“Why are pirates mean?”    “Because they just arrrrr!”

*pirates say arrr

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